Why counting calories in most cases is complete and total FARCE.

Math is perfect. But biology?

That’s messy.

Calories in and calories out is the “golden rule”, but my opinion of it has tarnished signficantly, and continues to lose it’s shine the longer I coach.

I’m not saying that physics (more specifically thermodynamics) is broken. I’m not saying you are broken, nor your metabolism.

I am simply saying that there are a LOT of factors that go into the equation, and this makes it nearly impossible to use accurately for most people.

Let’s take a look at how this usually works.

First, someone goes to a website, and tries to calculate the total calories they expend. Simple, right?

Wrong. Incredibly wrong.

First, your basal metabolic rate, or BMR. This makes up a large portion of your total calories burnt, and is basically just keeping your heart beating, brain thinking and just everything generally “not dying”.

Which is good.

This above pie chart is overly simplistic, particularly if you exercise a lot, but it’s a decent approximation.

The trouble is, BMR varies…a lot.

That online calculator might spit out 1421 for your BMR, but it could be 1100 calories or 1700 if you are an outlier.

How do you know if you are an outlier?

You don’t, unless you get it tested in a lab.

Activity Levels also vary, and you don’t really know how many calories you are burning through exercise.

Yes, a calculator can tell you that you are burning “127 calories per mile of running” But think logically here — that’s just an average as well, and it could easily be 10%, 20% or even 30% off if you are more or less efficient at running, or if the conditions are different, or if the pace is faster or slower.

Windy? Hilly? Tired? Sandy? Watery?

Does your calculator have inputs for those?

Even counting how much exercise is not easy. Was that 2 hours in the gym, or 30 minutes with 90 minutes of diddling your phone?

Another factor is weight training and HIIT training create Exercise Post Oxygen Consumption…they raise your metabolism afterwards.

For example, burn victims can have up to 80% higher metabolic rates!

Crazy, right?

All of that tissue takes energy to repair and rebuild. Similar story with the damage caused by weight traininng.

Is your calculator counting that?

Tapping your foot or fidgeting could easily be a few hundred, if not a thousand calories per day in some people. This is called Non-Exercise Activity Thermogenesis (NEAT) and also varies a TON.

Even something an innocuous as the environment is a huge factor as well. Shivering can burn up to 400 calories per hour…even if it is a quarter of that, it’ll add up. High temperatures can also increase energy expenditure.

Is your calculator counting that?

Hormones, especially thyroid can have a massive impact on metabolism…and you have no idea if this is having an impact unless you are legit hyperthyrodic or hypothyrodic and have been to the doctor. If you have high or low thyroid, this can definitely impact your metabolism, even if it doesn’t show up as “out of range” on a blood test.

High testosterone is going to cause more fat loss and more muscle gain, as it “partitions” calories into muscle.

Is your calculator counting that?

Thermic effect of food. What you are eating matters, as well. Nothing is free of energy, and that even includes digesting food.

No such thing as a metabolically free lunch.

Protein takes the most, about 30% of the calories in it are needed to break it down. Carbs, about 10%, fats about 1–4%, though it can be more based on the type of fat.

For example, MCT oil has a much higher impact than other fats on your metabolic rate:

“Mean postprandial oxygen consumption was 12% higher than basal oxygen consumption after the MCT meal but was only 4% higher than the basal oxygen consumption after the LCT meal.”

Even the type of carb can have a major impact-fructose and glucose are actually processed very differently, and their impact on body composition differs substantially as well.

Is your calculator counting that?

Even something as overlooked as water intake is huge.

Every liter of cold water that you drink is gonna be about 46 calories to warm up to body temperature. Nothing is free. It takes energy to do that, which comes from fat or carbs. That’s 2kg of fat loss in a year, by the way, just for drinking a liter extra of water a day. That takes like 20 seconds.

And a trip to the bathroom, but hey…sacrifice to win.

Stimulants can also increase metabolism. Coffee, caffeine and others can all increase metabolism substantially.

All of this adds up to where you cannot reliably predict your calories OUT on a daily basis to a level of accuracy needed to solely rely on counting calories.

If you found a way…I’m impressed.

Because if you are off by even 10 calories per day, which is basically the metablic equivalent of

• worrying about coronavirus for a day
• sneezing 6 times
• typing out an angry, macro-worshiping comment on this post
• seeing an attractive person walk by

…that’s 3650 calories per year, or roughly a pound* of fat gained or lost.

The calories IN side of the equation is just as complicated, confusing, complex, confounding and conflated.

It’s not just “I hit my maintence calories and I maintain my body”.

Oh no.

Unless you weigh and measure every meal that you eat, which obviously means cooking for yourself, you do not know how many calories you are consuming.

Let’s start with restaurants. They add butter, lard, grease or oil to just about everything.

Every type of food.

Every country. Almost every dish. Why?

Because it tastes better, feels more filling and if they didn’t, they’d have very few repeat customers. It’s a business decision, and the cost is your waistline.

We even have a “National Greasy Foods Day”

I’m not making this up. It’s October 25th.

Oh, and turns out that people are really, really bad at estimating calories.

“More than 4,000 people tracked what they ate for four days. Men reported consuming an average 2,065 calories a day, but were estimated to actually consume 3,119; while women reported 1,570 but actually consumed 2,393.”

A tablespoon of oil has more than 100 calories. That’s 10 pounds of fat in a year.

In a plate of rice or something that’s almost imperceptable.

“But I can go to their website and check the calori-”

Please. Don’t delude yourself.

Do you think every chipotle burrito is made by a robot?

An extra few seconds of mayo squirted into your wrap could be hundreds of calories.

Think packaged food is any better?

“The FDA allows food companies wide latitude in the accuracy of the calories listed on package labels — 20 percent in either direction. That means if a label says 200 calories per serving, it could be 240 calories or 160 calories or anything in between. What’s more, the FDA doesn’t do any systematic policing of labels to ensure that calorie counts meet even that lax degree of accuracy. The responsibility for label accuracy remains with the food companies, from national manufacturers to regional or local vendors. It basically works on the honor system. “

Yes, the honor of the big food companies that are happy doing this to us…

…is what you are trusting as you scribble down that packet of chips in your little notebook of foods each day.

Don’t trust the government to protect your interests over their own in anything.

Health is no exception.

Furthermore, if something has under 5 calories per serving, the manufacturer can count it as ZERO. This is even true if something has multiple, small servings. That pack of gum that has “zero calories” might just have 50, which adds up.

As mentioned above, fats, carbs and protein all have very different impacts on the metabolism, as do different foods.

“However, the story was different in mice eating a high-fat diet. In those mice, fructose consumption caused them to have more obesity and other indicators of metabolic dysfunction (e.g., reduced tolerance to glucose, impaired insulin signaling) compared to mice drinking the same caloric levels of glucose.”

In fact, the calories from food is just an estimation, on every level.

A study just within the last few years showed that almonds actually effectively have 20% fewer calories than previously thought.

“ the fat in almonds is not completely absorbed during digestion, due to almonds’ natural cellular structure, which encapsulates the fat, thereby impeding its absorption”

This doesn’t just apply to almonds. Gut bacteria, fiber intake and water intake can impact absorbtion enough to influence effective calories. Certainly if you have something like a tapeworm, it’s going to be hard to gain weight.

Is your calculartor asking you about that?

Furthermore, all of this is just asssuming that fat is the only thing that can be gained or lost. Water causes most fluctuations, and weight training has been shown to cause people to lose more fat, as it shifts calories towards building muscle.

Even sleep is going to change how much fat you lose.

Plus, I could easily write another few thousand words on habits, adherence, hunger, appetite, self control and peer pressure, but I’ll save that for another time.

So, tell me: is your little calorie calculator asking you all of that?

More importantly…are you asking yourself all of that?

*The most hilarious part of all?

Really the thing that pounds a few dozens nails into the coffin of this calorie counting catastrophe?

That “3500 calories per pound” that is often cited-even by me, sometimes?

Even THAT is not set in stone.

“A pound of body fat may contain anywhere between 3,436 and 3,752 calories, roughly estimated.”

Some have even suggested abandoning it altogether, much to the dismay of macro-worshiping coaches.

There’s even something called “brown fat” which burns calories at a high rate. So not all fat is equal.

So, in summary:

Most people are badly estimating both sides of the “calories in/calories out” equation, both sides are fluctuating significantly enough every day that you are chasing a moving target on both sides, and if you are off by even 5% that could lead to 10–15lbs of weight gain or loss in a year, but even that calculation is an estimation predicated on a physiological oversimplification that few people even in the health and fitness industry know or talk about.

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